Feel free to say No!
Read in saturday straits times recruit article regarding this issue and I find it some of the points relevant to me coz many times I find it hard to reject a person's request. Imagine everything say yes, then you wouldn't even have time for yourself coz everyone either asking you to go out with them or helping them to some stuff. Thus summarizing the points that the author stated and share with everyone.1. Develop a new respect for yourself
Revisit your personal boundaries and honour your commitments to yourself. Once you begin to respect yourself fully, others around you will find it easy to respect you. Thus, when you say no they wouldn't pressurize you.
2. Get your priorities right
Write down what is most important to you? Keep a copy with you at all times. Once you know what it is you want for yourself, it'll be easier to stop agreeing to things that will get in the way.
3. Take responsibility for yourself
When you realise that only you are responsible for yourself and for the tasks you take on, you will come to realise that saying yes to things you really want to say no to, is just a way of deferring making your own decisions.
4. Assert your right to ask for clarification or more information
This will buy you time to weisgh your options and priorities. It will also make it clear to other person that you are not agreeing to his request straight away.
5. Stop being nice
Not telling you to be evil or harsh. If often find yourself agreeing to things due to some need to be Mr/Ms Nice, the chances are you will follow through half-heartedly. This will not go down well with the person who asked you, and you will not feel good about yourself either.
6. Remember that you do not have to justify yourself
You have the right to say no without giving a reason for your answer.
7. Sandwich your response
Start answer by offering a positive comment to the person, followed by your decline, then a suggestion for an alternative.
8. Saying no does not reject the person
It simply refuses the request
9. Be assertive
Say what you want shortly and leaving out long explanations and apologies such as "I'm sorry, but...."
10. Practise
Say no in front of the mirror. Practise in real life - starting with smaller things and working your way up to saying no in more difficult situations.
posted by tornado @ 1:22 AM
3 Comments:
this feels something like the book i've just read...
if you're interested, try reading Richard templer's "the rules of life". it's very directional, a little like what you juz wrote ;)
Cheers for the new year!
Hey, i read that too... But its still on paper, need more practice in e working environment.
Hey, i read that too... But its still on paper, need more practice in e working environment.
r
Raphael
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